Sky Blue Ruffles

Life can throw some pretty unexpected curve balls now and again. No matter how hard I try to fend them off for myself, the truth is, more often than not it seems that the more I run away, the harder they seem to chase me. I've been feeling like an emotional mess lately. Is that okay to share here? Remember how I wanted this space to be real and genuine? Well friends, here it is..

If all you knew of me was what you saw in my outfit post photos or on my Instagram feed, then I may seem totally happy and one hundred percent content with my life. You would probably never think that I doubted what the future would hold for me or notice all the areas I feel so insecure about. The truth? There are times when I feel so desperately inadequate for the life I've been called to. This beautiful, crazy, chaotic at times, testosterone-filled, unbelievably happy, simple, little life. What do I have to give these people of mine and how on earth did I ever deserve to be their mama... 

There are days when I feel so consumed by thoughts of inadequacy that I just don't even know where to begin in picking myself up and moving forward. There's so much to do and accomplish and there is simply no starting point in sight.. Even if I did find a place to jump in, it would probably not end the way I was hoping for and I would once again feel responsible for single-handily failing my family.

The enemy is banking on my belief in those lies. Isn't that such a silly train of thought to follow though? The truth is that I am unlike anyone else in the entire world. The Lord has created me and ordained me to lead the life that I am CURRENTLY living. He's had a hand in all of the decisions, all of the successes and every little "failure" I've endured. Nothing that has happened in my life is a surprise to Him and the comfort that brings is indescribable. If I'm still being honest,... I don't know where I'd be or what kind of mother or wife I would have become if it was not for the Lord's abundant grace and gentle leading in my life. He is the ONLY way that I can succeed in anything I do. 

I've just felt a little emotionally strained these past few weeks and I know it's because I've been letting the troubles of the world get the best of me. Giving my attention to things that certainly do not deserve it and forgetting to fill up on the scriptures and the love that my boys are so quick to give out. It's quicksand and can be detrimental friends.

So, that's why I've been focusing so strongly on thinking positively as of late. Filling my mind with good and my heart with happiness and then allowing all of that positive energy to radiate outward to those around me. Oy can that be challenging at times though. I'm learning that happiness comes from within and that nothing from this world can ever bridge that gap. 

I wanted to pop over here for a moment and just share that. I pray you're feeling fulfilled and refreshed and that your memories will always be happy ones. Have a wonderful week friends!! Oh, and shop this fun look while you're at it!

| OUTFIT DETAILS |

OTS TOP | thrifted (exact top here though!)

WHITE SKINNY JEANS | Walmart (similar here)

REVERSIBLE LEATHER TOTE | Walmart (old, similar and much cuter style here)

SUEDE MULES | Rue (similar here)

Flutter Sleeves + Bows On My Toes

Sometimes, a day just requires an outfit with a more feminine touch to it. Today was one of those days. Flutter sleeves, a pretty little pattern and darling bow slides, all grounded with some raw edge denim and a super versatile tote. 

I love not having to think about how certain pieces are going to work together and this outfit gives me all of that freedom and then some. I think the Loft top may actually be maternity? Who really cares though. It's super cute and I love the fit and style so, imma just gonna go with it!

I'm trying to get back into the mindset of really soaking in my family in the stage that we are in right now. I've felt my mind wandering a bit lately and, it makes me all sorts of anxious and stressed and just, a bit confused. I think those are all pretty normal things to feel when you're growing a family, and trying to decided whether or not to expand it more. It's a big decision and, one I don't take lightly. It almost feels like I've been thinking of nothing else these past few months, actually. And, I know that's not exactly good for me. But, the longing that I have for another baby is real. The yearning to grow another little one, to feel him/her wriggle and squirm inside my belly and to experience the joy of birth all over again, ugh... It's just detrimental at times when I think about how I may not get to do all of those things again. 

I don't think it's ever easy to let go of certain seasons of life. Especially big ones like having babies. Mostly because, once you're past that stage, you never get to go back. I mean, you eventually get to experience it in a whole new way with grandchildren, I know that. But, to not ever be pregnant again or hold your own newborn for the very first time or nurse your baby again. I loved all of those things so much. Thoughts of them just consume me at times...

Like I said though, I LOVE the season we are in now. And I know that the Lord has the perfect plan for our family. Whether it be what my heart longs for or not. Ultimately, I want my desires to line up with His, in all areas of my life. So, that's where I am. Maybe not what you were expecting when you popped over to read this post but, it's something that's been on my mind a lot lately and I just thought that maybe I should share it here.

Have a wonderful day friends! I pray you're able to enjoy it and really soak it in for all that it's worth.

- xoxo

| OUTFIT DETAILS |

TOP | Loft (thrifted) similar style here & here

CROP RAW EDGE JEANS | Rue 21

BOW SLIDES | Time & Tru (Walmart) LOVE the blush color ones!

EARRINGS | Nickel & Suede (old style) Similar color & style here

TOTE | Walmart (old) similar here

Mama-hood

I don't have much to share today, other than this fun dress I thrifted a while back. It's so cheerful and flowy, I just love it. Plus, it's loaded with different shades of pink soooo, that kind of makes it a must for me right now. ;)

I hope y'all had a lovely weekend! We spent the day on Saturday with some friends that just had their third baby a few weeks ago so, I got to snuggle him pretty much all day, which I loooooved. (He reminded me so much of my boys when they were tiny!) They live out on a farm that we hunt on so, Glen got some plot stuff done solo while the boys played with their two older children and their mama and I visited. She is such a sweet person and a really wonderful friend and I am so thankful they finally decided to make MO their home! 

I could not be more grateful for the incredible Mama friends in my life right now. I gain so much encouragement and wisdom from them all and I know that God has a purpose for placing them near me. I think as mamas, having someone who knows our struggles, big and small, plays a huge role in keeping our sanity sometimes. Being a mom is, without a doubt, one of the hardest things I've ever done but, it is also the very most rewarding. Especially when I get to share it with so many other wonderful mamas. If you don't have a circle (or at least one or two) mama friends near the same season of life as you, I encourage you to seek them out! You have no idea how uplifting a relationship like that can be for you. On the days when you feel like you're at your wits end, you've changed a dozen diapers, wiped up countless cups of spilled milk, you haven't showered in a week and your me time consists of "cleaning" the kitchen while the kids are occupied elsewhere because, who wants to hang out with a bunch of dirty dishes.. I hear you mama, I've been there. But, that's why a support system of like-minded women is so important to me. I can text them out of no where and they instantly remind me that I'm doing a great job through all my failures and mistakes. It's pretty incredible. The most wonderful part though is that they make my best days even better. They share in my joys and the little triumphs of our days and there is something to be said about women like that. 

Have a wonderful week mamas! I pray it's filled with rest and fun and soaking in those littles and the memories your making with them in the right here and now. <3 

| OUTFIT DETAILS |

DRESS | thrifted (Knox Rose brand) Here on Poshmark

HEELS | Liliana (similar here on Poshmark)

PURSE | Walmart (old sale find) similar here on Poshmark

Jumpsuit Mama

I've been way into simplifying my style lately and so, jumpsuits are a given! I came across this one on Target online the other day and instantly loved it. When it came in the mail, I was head over heels! It was a bit long but, I kind of expected that seeing as how I'm kind of short. So, I took a few minutes to hem it where I needed it to be and now, it fits perfectly! I love that it's a dark color so it's slimming (which can be tough to achieve with a jumpsuit) yet it still has some pretty pops of color to brighten it up and make it more fun.

It's so comfortable too! The top hugs you perfectly and the pants are loose but not baggy. I paired it with one of my fave pairs of wedges and this fun purse that complimented the pink in the flowers well. Seriously, SUCH a great purchase! And, only TWENTY BUCKS! Yaaaa!

I searched Target's online selection of jumpsuits and came up with some more that I really like as well! I may definitely be adding a few more of these to my closet soon.

Recently I've been praying for peace about life. About our family, the plan God has for us, and for calm in my anxieties. I can definitely feel myself getting caught up in all of the stresses and worries I face sometimes but, when I finally reach the point of losing it all, giving it up is a much better option. I've been working harder to let go of things before I get to my breaking point lately. And, while I'm not exactly great at it yet, I can feel the Lord working that out inside my heart.

I'm so grateful for a loving, kind, genuine God who knows every gritty detail of my life, my mind and my heart and yet, He loves me anyway. Really because of them. He created all of that in me and knew that one day I would need help to gain some perspective on the whys of it all. And He was just waiting for me to reach out to Him and say, "Okay God, you're gonna have to step in here cause I reeeeally don't know where we're headed."

Isn't God good!? I put that out there as less of a question and more of a declaration! He IS good! And I am so thankful to be His. Happy Thursday friends. I pray you have a wonderful rest of your week and that you are having a truly blessed summer with your families!

| OUTFIT DETAILS |

JUMPSUIT | Target, on sale HERE

PURSE | Walmart (old) similar here

WEDGE SANDALS | Steve Madden (thrifted) similar here

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