Que Sera Sera

Have you ever looked at your life, your priorities, your hobbies, the things you spend the majority of your time doing and wondered, "when did I get here?..". That's kind of where I've been feeling the last little while. Stuck in a place of complacency and not really knowing when or how it all got so.. bleh. I've been in this spot before, more than once, and all I can say is, I'm so glad I can now recognize it before it becomes an issue for me. Trying to reassess the important things in my life and focus more on the things that bring me joy, the things that stretch me, the things that the Lord has placed there for a purpose, instead of digging myself into an ever-deeper whole of trying to just survive. 

Lately, I've felt more myself than I can remember feeling in a long time. Not that I've been unhappy, God knows I am SO blessed and I truly love my life. I adore my family and cherish every single day I am blessed enough to be with them. But, through the ups and downs and unknowns of it all, I slowly lost a bit of myself. These past few months, getting back into a really good (and enjoyable) workout routine, taking care of myself emotionally as well as physically, trying new things and putting myself out of my comfort zone at times have all made positive impacts on where/how I feel today. I've had some extremely low moments, a few pretty disappointing things thrown at me, but I've also been incredibly blessed and my eyes have just been opened a bit wider to all the wonderful things that I have to be grateful for.

No, nothing really life changing has happened, but, in a way it has. I think anything that effects positive change in your life is worth celebrating so, here I am. Feeling so thankful to be healthy, living a life I love, growing closer to my husband and children every day, making some really sweet memories and just knowing that there is only good in our future. There really are just so many beautiful reasons to be happy. 

Have a wonderful week friends!!

| OUTFIT DETAILS |

dress | Shop Pink Blush

shoes | Target

purse | Very Jane (old, similar style here)

Living on Fringe + Dry Shampoo

Hey friends! Has this not been the most insanely busy autumn of your life?!? Wait, maybe that's just me... Goodness, what a crazy past few weeks we've had. I'm beginning to wonder if this is just a phase or if it's actually what our life is going to look like in the coming years. I do love doing it with my people though, that's for sure!

I've been thinking a lot about intention lately. How I spend my time when I'm home with the boys every single minute and what, if any of it, will matter in the days, weeks and years to come. I want to use my time wisely. Whether it's doing laundry, loading the dishwasher, helping the boys through schoolwork, fitting in my Bible Study or taking time for me. How I tackle my daily tasks and to-do lists and react to the issues the boys bring to my attention are super important to me. I know now, probably more than ever, that they're watching every single thing I do. They see me wake up in the morning and immediately jump on my phone to scroll a little while I shake the brain fog. They see me take my breakfast to the living room to sit and watch "Gilmore Girls" or "Friends" while I eat. They see me scrolling through insta or pinterest while they're working problems and don't need my help. They see me choosing to worry more about how long it's going to take me to clean up the cup of milk they spilled than how they're feeling because they made such a big mess. They see it all.

As a mother, I know there will obviously be times when my children don't agree with or like me very much. They'll probably feel a bit anxious for independence by the time we finish school, I feel like that's pretty normal. But, I also want them to love the feeling they get when they come home. To know that their daddy and I love them more than anything else and really sought to put them first eighty percent of the time when they were growing up. I want them to think back and remember playing board games on the little round yellow table in the living room. Of blasting the fireplace til it's nearly eighty degrees in the living room and having almost the entire afternoon to just play and explore outside. I want them to remember all the important things. Like eating together as a family, praying before our meals, how Tyler only shuts one eye when he's praying most of the time and how he yells at his Daddy that "We pray first!" if he tries to sneak a bite beforehand.

I'm learning more and more each day that these moments with my boys are fleeting. I've probably shared thoughts along these lines before but, man, they are just at the forefront of my mind lately.

Am I doing all that I can to meet and exceed my family's needs? I don't just mean the obvious ones like, a nutritious meal or clean clothes. I mean the deep-rooted ones that will carry them through to adulthood and ultimately forge who they'll become and what type of family they'll have. You know the ones I'm talking about. I've determined to pray for my boys daily. That the Lord would help me and their Daddy to guide them in the ways of the Bible and that He would give me the strength (and patience) to be fully present in the little moments as well. Often times, I think we have so much going on at once that we feel torn to do well in every single thing we're mixed up in. While the majority of those things are most likely really good things, we need to realize that the time we have to shape and tend to our family in the ways we do right now is slipping by. And quickly. Is there something I can put on hold for now in order to put more of my time into playing with my toddler? Maybe an obligation that is a great thing but, takes away more opportunities to be with my family and just isn't worth it to me right now? 

I've considered this. I've done this. Letting go of certain expectations that others have for me so that I can be more fully present in the life of my family. And, while it can make me feel anxious and on-edge at first, it ALWAYS pays off in the end. And, when it comes down to it, I would much rather soak in my children and husband than give my energy to something else that just doesn't matter as much to me. 

I just don't want to miss it.. To look back ten, fifteen, even twenty years from now and think, where did the time go? I know I'll always think about that in a way. I already do. But, I don't want to wonder where I was in all of it. That's what I'm trying to get at. I want my children to remember me being there. Playing, exploring, make-believing right along side them. And still being happy and loving my life. That's the most important thing to me. That they know how much I REALLY  loved being their mom. Even through those hard times (and years..hello teenagers..). 

Anyway, that's a little glimpse at my thought process lately. How to let go of some things to be more present in others. And, it's been liberating. Happy Tuesday friends!! I pray this week is a GREAT one!

| OUTFIT DETAILS |

fringe cardigan | NUAGE (found it in grey on Poshmark)
tank top | Walmart
jeans | Target
booties | Old Navy (very similar)
purse | Steve Madden (thrifted, similar here)
earrings | (made by a friend) similar from Nickel & Suede

More Intention, Less Worry

 

Hey there! I know posts have been few and far between lately. I've had so many thoughts swirling around inside my head that, sometimes I just can't settle down my mind enough to share here. I don't want to put a "damper" on life but, I still want this space to be real and genuine. Does that make sense? 

To be honest, I've been feeling a little more stressed than normal these past few weeks and I've really hated it. Like, why do I let the freaking world get to me sometimes? So, I've been doing my best to push out thoughts of negativity and really trying to focus on being present and whole for myself and my family. 

And, it's been so rejuvenating! I've gotten house projects done that I've had on my "list" forever (see last post for some of those!), I've sewn a ton, I've taken a step back and really put some thought into what I wear and why I wear it (that may seem silly to some but, intention has been key for me lately), I've made more time for reading (something that I truly cannot get enough of), I've been prepping for bow season here in MO (and finally shot and recovered my first two deer this past week!) and have just been trying to keep things super intentional. I just know that this life we're given is so very short. And, I really don't want to miss it.

I've also been trying to let loose of the reigns a little these past few months with the boys. They're getting older (much to my dismay..) and, I want them to have more freedoms as they grow. They've earned it and show us everyday how they can be responsible and make good choices so, I know it's time to allow them a bit more room for mistakes. Having less control myself though, unfortunately, leads to more anxiety and worry on my part. So, I've been trying to leave that with the Lord as well. He can take such better care of my boys than I can so, I know they're in good hands. It's just one of the hardest (and simultaneously coolest things) as a mom to watch your children grow and the ways they need you change. That's probably the hardest part for me, personally. The not being wholly needed all the time. Twenty four, seven. I actually have time for myself every now and then and, honestly? Sometimes I really love it. But, then there are times when I absolutely hate it. Ugh, it's such a difficult thing to balance. Any fellow mamas out there have some good advice? I'd seriously love you for it.

We have been doing so great these past few weeks though. We just seem to be in a really happy place with our family and that I am cherishing as much as I possibly can.

Oh! And, our next big project isssss : A TREE HOUSE!! The boys (and me really) could NOT be more excited. I always longed for a tree house as a child and know that they are going to make so many incredible memories in it as the years go by. I can't wait to share progress photos and an update when it's all done!

| OUTFIT DETAILS |

dress | Express (used here on Poshmark)

otk boots | Charlotte Russe (old, very similar style here)

purse | thrifted (similar here)

earrings |  Nickel & Suede (size large)

Farmhouse Living Room Before & After

This post and the projects in it have been a long time coming. And, I don't just mean since we've updated our furniture a few weeks ago. I've been dying to have my way with this space of ours since we moved upstairs and I realized that, quite literally, everything in this room was brown. The furniture, the trim, the accent wall and curtains, even the carpet was a shade of tan. I've always loved this room. It's so warm and cozy. But, this new furniture set completely transforms it! It went from being so very basic and boring (and well, blah-ish) to a room that I genuinely enjoy and cannot get enough of! 

I've got so many pictures to share, sources and similar product links (also, a very comical (now) story about bringing it home..) so, please just bear with me and I hope you'll enjoy the read! 

We purchased our brown microfiber set the year we were expecting our second child, about eight years ago. I remember being big and pregnant and thinking, I love these SO MUCH. We had been married about three years and, like all newlyweds, had a house full of "hand me down" furniture up to that point. We were just beginning to make some purchases for ourselves and this was one of our first. I'll admit that it served us so well. And I was able to sell it for a great price so, that helped a lot with the purchase of this new set! 

I knew I wanted a "farmhouse style" sofa set this time around but, convincing the hubby would be a bit of a struggle. He's come a long way in the decor department since we were married though and, in the end, he completely agreed on the set that I loved the most. Now, before you say, "Nichole, you got white?... You have four boys and you got WHITE?!". I totally get the hesitation for most people. However, we don't allow our boys to eat on the couch. Never have, don't see us beginning to allow it anytime soon (hello, boys just get messier don't they?). So, white is totally not a problem for us. Glen and I occasionally eat on them, usually after our boys are in bed at night, but, nothing too messy so, I think we'll be fine there. If anything I'll just need to do a little spot cleaning every now and then so, I'm not too worried. 

This set was a floor model sitting in the very first place we looked and I was immediately drawn to it. We went a few other places but, eventually came back to it, obviously. The couch was the very last one so, we bought it as is (but in perfect condition). The ottoman and chair, however, were brand new. Well, so we were told. After getting the chair home and unpackaged, we realized it had three major imperfections on it. One being what looked like a long box knife slit in the side and the other two were large black marks. Presumably from shipping? We're not sure. Here comes the crazy part. (get ready) We loaded the damaged chair into our truck to switch it out for the another new chair about a week after getting the set home. We had to drive to Springfield which is about an hour away from where we live (small town, MO). The drive up was perfect. Smooth with no hitches. The way home however was a slightly different story.. 

We got to the furniture store and, after having them unpackage the new chair so we could look it over before having them rewrap it, got it loaded up. We put it in the back of my husband's flat bed truck, the same way we did the other to bring it back. Everything was good. My husband didn't strap it down though so, I mentioned he may want to, just in case. He claimed that he didn't strap the other down on the way up to Springfield and it was fine so, there was nothing to worry about. Okay hunny. I mean, he's in construction and hauls stuff all the time, what do I have to be worried about, right?? Fast forward to the drive home on the interstate. We were about twenty minutes out from Springfield, just chatting and joking around with our boys when my husband says, "aaaand there goes the chair!"... WHAT?!?! I whirled around in my seat to see it land less than two feet in front of the car behind us as they swerved into the other lane to miss it.... Gahhhh... Just picture us coming to a screeching halt on the side of the interstate, backing up in the grassy median, running to get the chair out of the road before someone hit it and then carrying it all the way back to the truck.... We were QUITE the site, let me tell ya... One of the leg support boards was broken and the other three legs sustained some damage as well. Nothing too bad and, honestly, we haven't even replaced them yet because the carpet in the living room covers it. Haha. But, MAN. What an eventful trip back home! I could tell my husband felt so bad about it because all he could do was smile and agree with me the entire rest of the way back. 

Holy moly. Looking back, a semi passed us just as we went under an overpass and we think there was some strong wind that whirled it around and just took it. I'm so so thankful that the people in the car behind us were paying attention. All I could think was how much worse it could have been had it landed in their windshield..... Needless to say, my stomach was in knots the entire drive home after that. I guess, if anything, we'll have a good story to tell our grandkids though, right? lol 

Anyhoooooo, onto the photos! I'll include some links to exact or similar products along the way!

sign | made by me and the hubby (love the signs from this shop though!) (paint markers used)

frames | Walmart

prints | Shutterfly

tan pumpkin |Walmart (in store only)

buffalo check pumpkin | made by me (you tube tutorial I followed here)

light up jack o'lantern | super old ceramic, updated by me with chalk paint and APC wax

faux greenery | Walmart (lighted style here)

 

 

 

wooden bowl | thrifted (similar here)

twig pumpkin | walmart (old, similar here)

frame | Walmart (old, similar here)

butter churn | antique (similar on ebay here)

ceramic pumpkin | super old (similar here)

cream pumpkin | Walmart (in store only, similar here)

rabbit figurine | Perrennial (a small boutique in the town I live in, love this one from amazon)

faux moss and natural paper grass | seasonal at Walmart 

FALL banner | Target dollar section

 

old toolbox | diy at church a few VBS's ago

small chalkboard | Walmart (old, similar here)

PRAY BIG pillow | Amazon

lamp set | Lowes (old, similar here)

piano | antique we purchased from some family friends 

decorative cloche | Amazon

wooden square | Walmart (in store only)

natural jute placemat | Walmart

distressed bird | Marshalls (similar)

love you more block sign | Perrennial (similar)

 

round table | antique (similar here) 

distressed bird (same style but larger than the other pictured) | Marshalls

candle holder | thrifted (similar here)

large cream pumpkin | Walmart (in store only)

(all large throw pillows came with the furniture set)

large sign | upcycle by me from an old cork board

basket weave pumpkin | Joann's 

two small fabric pumpkins | made by me using tutorial linked above

 

 

 

entryway bench | thrifted (similar here)

buffalo plaid pillows | made by me (inspired by these)

basket | Lowe's (similar style here)

large pillow | came with living room furniture

wreath | Walmart (diy, bought it plain)

cotton stems for wreath | Walmart

entry rug | Menards (old, similar here)

blankets | similar here

shooties | JC Penney

ceramic bird | Perrennial (similar here)

Tobacco basket | thrifted (similar here)

candles | Walmart

 

 

buffalo plaid ruffle table runner | made by me (similar here)

 

chicken wire basket | Walmart

small white bucket | Walmart (in stores only)

small pumpkin | Walmart (upcycled by me, similar to linked above)

ceramic milk bottle | antique (similar here)

large old tin bowl | family heirloom 

large burlap pumpkin (inside tin bowl) | made by me (followed tutorial above)

wire milk crate | antique (similar here)

old glass bottles | super old side of the road find lol (similar bottles here)

 

quote sign | diy by me (similar here) (paint markers used here + here)

old cookie jar | antique 

 

 

coat rack | upcycle by me (story at the end of this post! scroll down to read it!)

 

white chair | old chair upcycled by me

basket | old and.. ahem, falling apart lol (similar style here)

gravy boat "planter" | wedding gift (similar here)

curtains | Lowe's (old)

 

dining table | Ashley Furniture Homestore (it was a wedding gift, hoping to update soon!) 

(no longer available so here's a similar style on amazon)

 

metal HOME sign | Joann's (couldn't find it sorry)

Pumpkin Butter candle | Perrennial (similar here)

parsley crock | Perrennial (similar here)

serving spoons | super old

round cutting board | family heirloom (similar style here)

 

 

letter board | Walmart

lamp | Walmart

 

canvas print | Canvas People

blessed sign | locally made (similar here)

deer mount by a local taxidermy (love how it looks on the barn wood!)

 

Back to this diy coat rack! My husband's grandparents are always sharing stories from their youth and things they've learned growing up in a very difficult time. His grandmother, who we affectionately call Grammie, has told us many times about the home her grandparents lived in and how she would visit and all the wonderful memories she has of the place. Last Memorial Day, we decided to drive down to the old homeplace with Grammie and Poppie and take a look at it for ourselves. It took a while to find, the driveway was barely even visible from the overgrowth but, we eventually found it and made our way up it's long and winding corners. We drove as far as we could before parking the suburban and going by foot the rest of the way. And, oh was it worth it! The house was still standing, though in very poor condition. As we explored, she shared stories and memories and pointed out things she remembered about the time she spent here. What an emotional time, let me tell you. We came to the sun porch right off the kitchen and saw that many of the beautiful boards from the walls were falling off. Some were lying around the floor and some were barely attached. We decided to take a few home with us so, we carefully removed a few. Goodness guys, it was so so cool. I used one of the boards and made a scripture quote for Grammie for Christmas last year. My Mother in Law and her sister were gifting Grammie a gallery wall of board photo prints and this was meant to be above it. It turned out perfectly and looks so so good as the feature wall of their home. 

I still had two boards left so I was back to square one on what to do with them. I wanted something eye catching but, useful. Something we would enjoy looking at and be able to remember all we were told every time we noticed it. I wanted it to be perfect. That's when I landed on this space. I've always kind of struggled with decorating our entryway because I didn't want anything to make it too cluttered. It's only about five-ish feet wide and about six foot long so, it's not a large space. You may remember me sharing about this bench I thrifted a while back with the intention of it going into the guest room but, it fit so perfectly here, I just couldn't resist. I love how it looks. Then comes the space above it. I couldn't do a sign because there's one on the wall mirroring this one. One of the boards I had saved from the homeplace was just a few inches too long to fit between the trim of the archway into the dining room and the trim around the front door. That's when I knew. We simply cut it off and cleaned it up a bit. Basically, dusted it off, no major cleaning done. I got a copy of a photo Grammie had of her brother standing on the front porch of the home and put it into an envelope before taping it to the back. Then, I wrote where the board was from and we screwed it on, making sure to hit studs so it would be nice and sturdy. I found these simple hooks at Walmart and added three of them so it wouldn't be too busy. From there, I made the wreath and the buffalo plaid pillows and, put it all together! It honestly makes me so nostalgic and emotional when I start thinking about all the history behind that one single board. How incredible that it ended up in our home where we can share with everyone where it came from. Then, one day, it'll be removed again and it's story can be told to more generations. I just utterly love it. It's the perfect entry to our home and it came together just as I had imagined. 

If you've stuck around til the end of this post, you're a rock star! Thank you so much for reading and going along on this somewhat emotional journey with me! I have so many more updates and diy's I want to share soon so I hope you'll come back! Have a lovely week friends! I pray many blessings for you and yours always!